travel with me from SAHM to working mum….

Released from the Domestic Bubble


Things I Should Have Told My Husband About The School Run

Out I float into the ‘real world’. Quite where I have been for the last 12 years is a mystery, but it is generally accepted that ‘we’ (my Comrades on the Domestic Front) live in a ‘bubble’ which we occasionaly leave for 3/4 weeks in the long summer holidays, experience life out of the bubble and scurry back with hair-raising tales of how things are done in Dorset or Manchester.  Let’s be fair.  Life in this bubble is pretty easy.

I have made the train, travelling to my full-time course. Like a pregnant first time mother not seeing past the birth, I am remembering things I should have told my husband about the school run:

  1. Marshall the troops  10 mins before you actually want them to get in the car.
  2. The youngest child may have the most bags but he will remember them all. The eldest will leave that up to you.
  3. Don’t expect anyone to let you out of the driveway.  This is Monday morning, not the weekend.
  4. Eldest daughter will not kiss you goodbye, or middle or youngest sons.  Even 7 yr olds are aware of their playground image.  You will be lucky to receive a goodbye grunt.
  5. Avoid all conversation with anyone wearing make-up.  They have obviously been up since the crack of dawn, and will be better organised than you.  Most likely to say: ‘Have you remembered the Viking costume for Book Week?’
  6. If middle son refuses to leave the car, the answer to 5 is – ‘no’.
  7. Never return home for a forgotten anything.  Tantrums, tears and a fear of Miss Whiplock are a normal part of growing up.  Helicopter parents stunt their children’s development.
  8. Don’t make eye-contact with the teacher at drop off/pick up. Let them wait until parents’ evening to tell you how behind, disorganised, badly behaved is your pride and joy.
  9. Like make-up wearers, beware of anyone smiling.  They are on the PTA and want your money, soul, or both.
  10. Avoid returning home for as long as possible.  The house will have been ransacked by demons in the half hour you have been away.
  11. Strong coffee.

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This entry was posted on February 28, 2011 by in family life, school, working mother and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

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